1. quiet 


2. running away 

(maruza imi) 

head up, shoulders back; relax 
keep living your life like it's far from your last 
all my exes probably have houses and kids of their own 
don't you ever feel like you don't belong 

i keep running away 

i wanna die in the ocean 
the place where i'm most afraid 
far beyond walls of suffocating space 
bury me in your unforgiving waves 

i keep running away 

(run away) 
heart be still 
(run away) 
heart be still 

should cancer ever knock on my door 
i wouldn't be courageous enough to ask for more 
i'll continue a well practiced retreat 
faithful submission to what is killing me 

...running away... 

3. i don't know what i'm doing 

i'm not trying to break your heart 
and i'm sorry if it seems that way 

i don't know what i'm doing 

we, we're older now, oh yes... 
and we don't heal like we used to 
(words usually escape me 
but not when they're aimed at you) 

i don't know what i'm doing 

you wish you could love me the way that i want to be loved 
and i wish i could love you the way that you want to be loved, too 
(the things that changed here... 
help to rearrange here) 

i don't know what i'm doing 

4.) normal human being 

calisthenics yawning, early in the morning 
i'd like to shower longer, they say don't waste water 
     - don't be late, go! - 
jaywalkin' a busy street, ignoring the cars that honk at me 
give the man twenty bucks and wonder if he'll spend it on drugs 
    - comin' in a little early, hope the boss will notice me - 

cuz i'm trying to be a normal human being 

don't drink too much coffee, enjoy your green smoothie, uh-huh 
i wish i could go out to eat but i don't have the money, uh-uh 
     - papers piling up, you're gonna have to work through lunch again -   

   feeling like you're drowning, but ya better be grateful somehow 
   when i was younger, i thought i'd be a rockstar by now 
   i'm just bleeding the checking account dry, making music that people don't buy 
   well, every thought i think i've thought it through, oh nevermind, it's time to purge the attic of my mind! 

get home relax and breathe but don't watch too much t.v. 
i'm a little low on food but all i wanna do is eat, eat, eat 
read a book to stimulate a healthy dose of imagination 
and late at night, if i have time, a glass of wine and an idea that's mine!

i'm tired of being a normal human being 

5.) when someone offers you  

a day may soon come when a special someone  
presents to you a new world  
i hope you'll think it through  
i hope it unsettles you  

when someone offers you what i forgot to  

you'll probably feel alive for the very first time  
love can make what's wrong seem so right  
but i will still be here  
should you want me to be near  

when someone offers you what i forgot to  

i won't make you stay, though i'll hate it if you go away  
we'll both survive anyway  
the only thing i'll say is: that too will someday fade  
and it'll hurt to sit and wonder if you should have stayed, babe... 

6. yearning

yearning... (ad infinitum) 

     i'm a fool to believe 
     that you'd be here waiting for me 


(i'll sing you a tired melody 
of a word that i can't stop repeating 
because if i sing it again and again 
maybe soon it won't mean anything) 

7. love is...

the rain is pattering, it doesn't calm my nerves 
it's a sound already known, so it's never even heard 
outside the sun comes out, the flowers in full bloom 
no one notices - if you take me for granted, i'll take you for granted, too 

   love is a messy thing 
   like rain in the heart of spring 
   watch me hurt everyone i love 
   because you know my love is a messy thing 

the sun and the trees in hard-earned harmony 
and these exchanges that change everything 
the moon and the seas, well, they too must agree 
and as I watch the waves come ashore, I wonder if it's bad to need a little more 

   love is a messy thing 
   like rain in the heart of spring 
   watch me hurt everyone i love 
   because you know my love is a messy thing 

far from here another galaxy 
do you ever wonder if there's another you and another me 
well, that's a little deep; another question i can't solve 
but for reasons far beyond me, our galaxy has dissolved

8. desperation 

lives on repeat, will we ever be 
like the books that we read and the films that we see 
oh the courage to be who we want to be 
and the brick wall that we never see 
but now we see that it doesn't budge 

how do we create something new  
when we feel as if we cannot move 
how do we get back up when we feel  
as if we're stuck 


(someday i will die... 
someday my mother will die... 
someday my father will die... 
someday my brothers will die... 
someday my lover will die... 
someday i will die...
oh my mind, you're no business of mine... 
someday i will die...) 

we all want to make it out of here alive 

9. giving up 

dad, i've been thinking about giving up 
i was younger then but I wonder now 
how'd it feel to close up shop 

i guess i thought there'd be more 
i'm thirty-two now and i still haven't found  
what i've been yearning for 

dad, so many times you tried 
to make your own way but life, i'm learning 
isn't always fair or right 

   well i'm so tired of it all 
   tired of the weight i place on my shoulders 
   i'm so tired of it all 
   it used to be a joy to sing and create things 
  well i just don't know anymore 

dad, i've been thinking about the shop 
the people, time, and the money lost 
i believed in what you made 

dad, i understand it now 
defeated look and the lowered brow 
how did you endure 

dad, is there purpose and meaning 
does anything matter 
i still believe in what you make 

   well i'm so tired of selling myself 
   tired of the weight i place on numbers and sales 
   i'm so tired of it all 
   it used to be a joy to sing and create things 
   well i just don't know anymore 

everyone's moving; i'm standing still 
in desperation i prayed to a light up in the sky 
(but it was just a plane passing by) 

so, i'll do what my father did 
suck it up  
and start again... 

10. either way 

i don't know what to say anymore 
doubt has marooned me on an unfamiliar shore 
how much more of my mind can i possibly lose 
who even am i, what are we here for 

either way, i want us to be happy 

nothing holds my name; everything is born to change 
everyone i know some day will go 
the current carries me, carries you; to know that we know 
that we don't know, nothing to hold on to so... 

either way, i want us to be happy 

(let go) 

i hope to god that God exists 
i can think of no sweeter heaven than if heaven is real 
but i don't know so i have to make my vow 
to today, to now - this is it and may it be paradise 

either way, i want us to be happy 

11. what's left to say 

the days that were ours have sifted through my selective memory 
and knowledge like the rain makes a fool of me 
in the aftermath of our love and pain, well, what's left to say 
i feel so...i feel so...i don't know 

the lies we believed 
we lived the lies we told 
now, honestly, the lies are all i can see 
blurred and indistinct, covering all i've come to know 

now i'm the age that you were when we first met 
i guess i'm not over it yet 
so i climbed the highest mountain and found the tallest tree 
carved a hole and shared secrets only known to me 
 - maybe you'll find it someday 
   and hear everything
   i was too scared to say - 

i'm moving on this time 
...well, sometimes... 

the me that was then will always be 
yes, always be yours 

i guess you got right back to your life 
but i didn't get right back to mine

12. we're going to be ok 

i still remember the first time i told you i loved you 
and then the time we shared our first kiss 
i felt alone, just like when i proposed 
you were scared, i know - what would happen if...

we're going to be ok 

eight years later i wasn't thinking about you 
i tend to withdraw and so i withdrew - lost and confused 
burned out, as a matter of fact 
in a kind but defeated tone i heard, "i want my husband back" 

last night, once again, i felt scared 
then you comforted me and in your arms i knew i was warm and safe 
i love you more than i have words to say 
i'm sorry i hurt you - that was a different time, but tonight is a new day 

we're going to be ok 

13. settle down 

the first couple of years we rented from your parents 
when our love was oh so near, and our feelings transparent 
oh yes... 

then we moved away in the search for something better 
we were led astray, the grass was not greener 
on the other side... 

   forget all that now, things will turn around 
   it's time to settle down 

we downsized so we could fit in the apartment next to my parent's house 
we slowly went adrift, separating our lives 
babe, do you seen it now... 

you worked on your degree while i developed my career 
and i released a few cds, overlooked by my peers 
i was weaker than i appeared 

   forget all that now, things will turn around 
   it's time to settle down 

we can talk about a house and kids, embrace the uncertainty 
there was never any guarantee 
but we'll both continue to try, earnestly 

for right now we're both so tired 
it's time to settle down 

i love you